[antifragile 4 🔥] Victims & Students, How To Get What You Want, Do Hard Things, Chat With Your Future Self
#2: A weekly newsletter focused on viewing fatherhood through the lens of antifragility.
Welcome to the 2nd edition The Antifragile Dad’s newsletter, called The Antifragile 4. It’s a weekly 4-item newsletter focused on viewing fatherhood through the lens of antifragility. Expect it every Friday.
I’m continuing to experiment with the format. This edition is shorter & more digestible.
Here’s this week’s Antifragile 4:
An Idea: Victims & Students
A Post: How To Get What You Want
A Book: Do Hard Things
A Question: Your Future Self
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1.) An Idea: Victims & Students
“There were victims and there were students” - Hi Ren, by Ren (this music video is intense, buckle up)
Consider this way of viewing difficult situations:
There are victims & there are students.
In every difficult situation, you have a choice.
A choice to capitulate, to become a victim of circumstance, to let things happen to you. To become a victim.
OR
You have a choice to learn. To grow, no matter how hard you’re getting your ass kicked. To become a student.
So no matter the situation, know that you have a choice. The choice to be the victim, or the choice to be a student. Which will you choose the next time you’re tested?
2.) A Post: How To Get What You Want
Your ability to attain the thing that you want is directly correlated with how willing you are to experience its opposite. - StoicDreams
Working out has you feeling weak while making you strong
Learning something new makes you feel dumb while it’s making you more intelligent
Setting boundaries will have you feeling alone while you’re creating new healthy relationships in your life
Check out the post below:
3.) A Book: Do Hard Things by Steve Magness
This book is all about redefining toughness. Written by an elite endurance coach, it’s just as applicable to parenting as it is to athletics.
It’s one of those books where I have about 6,000 Kindle highlights - there are truly SO many nuggets of wisdom - but here’s the one that sums it up best:
“Instead, real toughness is experiencing discomfort or distress, leaning in, paying attention, and creating space to take thoughtful action. It’s maintaining a clear head to be able to make the appropriate decision. Toughness is navigating discomfort to make the best decision you can.”
I want to cultivate this brand of toughness in both myself and my kids. Truly a meta-skill.
4.) Two Questions: Your Future Self
If you had the chance to sit down with your future self from 15 years in the future, how would he answer these two questions? (Most effective if you calculate both your age and your kids’ ages…makes it more real)
What should I do more of?
What should I do less of?
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Share with a fellow dad.
Join us at The Antifragile Dad Community. Until next week, be fire & wish for the wind. 🌬️🔥
Thanks for reading,
Chris